Ask me anything! 16 yrs

home message me submit mine about

"I’m not going to be the girl you marry, but I’ll be the girl you’ll be thinking of 20 years from now while you engage in polite sex with your boring wife who fakes her orgasm to make you feel better about your receding hairline."
e.b (via e-kallas)

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thetomska:

tiorickyaoi:

I’m sick of people wrongly defining bisexuality. It’s not ‘attraction to both men and women’ it’s about being attracted to ‘bi’ things like bicycles, binoculars, bilinguals and binary coding smh

So glad someone finally cleared this up.

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turkey-imported-from-maine:

firelorcl:

meladoodle:

i wanna be a reverse tooth fairy where i rob people and then scatter human teeth on their bed

a dentist

i dont know what your dentist is doing to you but i think you need to go to the police

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bewilden:

fileformat:

how are these people not dead

Oh he can eat plastic bags and the other lady can eat drywall, but if I want to enjoy some fucking cookie dough I’ll get salmonella and die

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clarenecessities:

angryseawitch:

angryseawitch:

thetechnicolortrenchcoat:

Today is Copernicus’s 541th birthday. You may remember Copernicus as the man who said “Hey, what if the Earth went around the sun?” To which the Catholic Church replied “Hey, what if we set you on fire?” 

the catholic church did not kill copernicus lol…?

look at how many notes this post has. you’re all going to fact check hell

"541th"

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extravirginoliveroil:

middle school boys in the locker room

pink-vulva:

reasons i want to look GOOD 

  • for myself
  • for myself
  • to plant the seed of envy in other bitch’s hearts
  • for myself

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egg-rolls:

when u stand up 2 fast n suddenly ur floatin thru space n time

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unlawfully:

Having a cute waiter like I’ll have the chicken with a side of that dick

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frantbh:

so glad his leg isnt broken

swoobats:

alphabet soup more like times new ramen am i right

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